LONDON, OH LONDON, WHERE ART THOU

6 august 2005

London, oh great london of old. got my self a travel card for zone 1 and zone 2 for 4.70p. apparently travelcard for zone 1 only also cost the same. took the tubes to westminster abbey, where the prime minister does his thing. the big ben howers above with its clock and thank god this is not malaysia. if it is, all the tourist will be looking at their watches to see if the time shown in their watches are the same as the time shown at most broken watch tower in malaysia. there is a british air way ferris wheel next to the river. it is a big ass wheel. it looks marvelous, and i dont think they can just dismantle it and move to another town like a moving circus act. if it were to run off its spoke wheel, all it could do is sink into the river thames. half submerged in water, it would look good as a worse case scenario, just like the one in Independence Day, the Liberty hosting its torch above the water.

LONG ONE MATE, CHEERS

I have made an intelligent guess that all brits dont have a shy attitude towards their counter parts. as one can see from their toilet, the male urinals stand along each other and there is not bloody divider between the urinals. one could just go and have a piss and is one were to look side ways and not stare at the wall, one would just go 'bloody hell, thats the longest i've ever seen in me bloody life....cheers mate, use it well, the force is with you! '. there you have it, british decency down the drain and into the urinal hole.

INTELLIGENT CHATTER

me and my friend KF just had an intelligent discussion while riding a bus to a watering hole (pub, not a toilet). we talked about love, life and marriage. it seems we gave marriage in the context of love, a shelf life of 4 years, if the couple is lucky enough. most of the time, love continues just for 2 years after the wedding ceremony. to keep the marriage going on and stable, a child is needed to put on the hand cuffs between husband and wife, so that they would get a divorce. thats our immature view of the situation called marriage. one might say, the same hole dug all over again makes it bigger for sure and not worth digging again. thats why a lot of men love to find new grounds to dig a hole... you know what i mean? as i said in my last vonversation, more and more people choose to be a singleton and just have a life of temporary girlfrens or boy frens or lesbian and gay pals. what ever.....

HARROD's LEPRECHAUN

well, the first time i encountered Harrods was looking at a small green plastic bag that i got from one of my customers in Sungai Petani, by the name of Dr Louis Leh. he is one of the genuine friends i have got in my work as a professional medical sales representative. both of us were trading stuff, so i got back my stuff in a plastic bag of Harrods. Harrods is just outside the tube station at Knightsbridge. it looks big like a shopping centre, almost the same size as a Tesco i guess. inside, the floor is covered in green carpeting. the place has a majestic feel to it. stuff here is almost the same as stuff anywhere, only thing is, it has more workers or sales people dressed up more stylelishly. even the toilets have a robot, usually a black robot that might serve you by making you feel useless by spraying hand lotion on to your hands and giving you a spray of prefume, as if the person just came out of the rubbish dump. thats a good service. even they have a water dispensing unit in the toilet, but i dare say it taste something like the water flushed from its toilet bowls. anyway, harrods is a good place to hang out. classy shopping centre. also i was impressed by their bookstore that have, i think a full collection of Isaac Asimov's foundation series, like foundation, foundation and empire, second foundation, foundation and earth, forward the foundation and foundations's edge. dissappointingly, they do not have Prelude to foundation, which in my opinion quite a favourite to me. i read it while i was in oxford. another book that i liked was Caves of Steel, and i found the second chapter or the continuation of it , called the Naked Sun.... and all this has nothing to do with sex, mind you.

LET ME ENTERTAIN YOU

in london, there are many entertainers, street ones. i was quite amused by such person who was doing street magic with balls and a cup. making the balls dissapear. it wasnt much the magic that entralled me, it was his way of presenting it with tomgue in cheek humor. anyway i did something i could never believe i could do, i gave him 50p for his splendid performance. there were of course some people playing an intrument like a guitar, a violin. a girl was playing a familiar tune, i think it was the Bach's Partita iii fur Violin Solo in E Note. so dropped a 20p. she was in the hole, i mean in the tube crossways.

SOUTH KENSINGTON

in this place, it is near the Fulham and Chelsea area. it is a high class end of london. here i found a restaurant owned by a malaysian and it was really quite cheap. i had my self a Yeung Chow fried rice and a can of coke for only 3.60p. the coke was 0.60p (in contrast to 0.90 sold in my previous restaurant) and the rice was only 3 pounds. previous place i think had one with a price of 5 pounds plus. such a big difference, they dont even have a 10% service charge... wow, such a cheap place with good food. i will be back to this area because the Science Museum and Natural History is located near here. might try other dishes here.

SAATCHI GALLERY

there was an art gallery next to the river thames and also a stones throw (if you have supermans strengh ) from the big ben. saw some art gallery and there was one particular art that fills half of the room with water and the reflection of the water is the art form. really modern and bizarre. after the show of arts, went into one of the theaters and watched a chinese film with english subtitles. i guess i watched for an hour for free.

MALAYSIA UNFORGOTTEN

a friend recommended me to go and find the malaysian embassy which is located in Bayswater. underneath the embassy is a place called malaysian hall and it sells malaysian food. i ordered some nasi minyak with curry daging and it was extremely heavenly to taste malay food after 3 months of fasting from spicy food. all in all, it cost me 4.80p which is quite alright. just food for thought, 4,80 times the current currency value of 6.799 and the meal cost 32.59 ringgit. now the diffrence in value of the ringgit has widened since last week , which was at a low at 6.50. even the americans complain about the cost of things and food here in this land of gloom. they say it is twice as expensive as the cost in America. of course i said it was due to the diferrence in currency, but they say that things here cost more due to service charge, VAT and other forms of taxation that the government love to introduce.

ARSENAL, DEAR HOME OF MY HEART

i went to arsenal, i had to do it. i was to me what Mekka was to the muslim people. i come here to pray to my favourite gods. i talked to some people before coming here, they say to be careful of your surroundings because it is a negros area. well, i never knew my arsenal was in the ghettos. i walked to Highbury, the name of the stadium, but i could not even see the outline of the structure. it was just one bit wall with Arsenal written on it. a worker in the tube said that the stadium is surrounded by houses, so it was hard to see the stadium. only some parts of the stadium is visible from the outside. i then went to the new stadium, called the Emirates Stadium which can house 60 thousand spectators compared to the 40 thousand in Highbury. it was still in construction with the tall cranes silhoutting the dark blue sky. it was only a ten minutes walk from the old stadium. i cant wait for the kick off match between Arsenal and Chelsea this sunday. the match is at 3pm.... very eager, eager indeed.

COVENT GARDEN. GARDEN OF EDEN FOR DRUNKS AND PARTYGOERS

went to covent garden for a pint of beer. found myself a quiet bar and started away counting my expenses for this 6 day journey from oxford to Bath, to Cardiff, back to Oxford, then to London for 3 nights. for 6 days, i have spent almost 3 weeks worth of salary( 1 week earnings around 160 pounds).
there were a lot of beca or tricycles around, reminds me of penang island, minus the old timers riding it, here it is youngsters who are predominantly not british. i got lost and could not find the tube station. so i asked around and a 2 passerbys gave me the wrong direction. bloody assholes, i guess they were real drunk. but at last i found a group which pointed me the right way. 2 brit guys (can always tell a brit by the smell of beer) and a girl. tired to ask the guys, but i knew they were drunk already, so i asked the girl instead.

EXPENSES HIGH FOR TRAVEL

bought my self a ticket to chesterfield which cost me 51 pounds. that s pretty expensive for a trip train right... anyway, thats the destination to destiny...

SHE AINT A LOOKER,
SO, SHE AINT A HOOKER,
TONIGHT, YOU ARE NOT A FUCKER,
SO, YOU ARE A WANKER!

shakespear's forgotten diary of a perverted mind....